20 Things I’ve Learned in 20 Years

When they say the cliché, “time flies when you’re having fun” man were they right. I turned 20 years old yesterday. 20! As I was sitting around the dinner table enjoying quality time with my family, I began to realize how far I’ve come and how much I’ve learned about who I am and who I strive to be. I know I have decades worth of mistakes to make and memories to come, but I decided to reflect on what these last 20 years have taught me, and this is what I came up with…

20 Things I’ve Learned in 20 Years

1. Family always comes first. Pick up the phone and call your siblings, your cousins, aunts & uncles. If you’re lucky enough to still have your grandparents, call them! Family is one of the only constants in life, check in on them, catch up. If you have the ability to visit your family, do it. Whether your are 20 minutes away or an 8 hour plane ride, you will never regret the time you spent with them, but you will regret the time you didn’t. I would do absolutely anything for one more Lifetime Movie Network and fudge swirl ice cream date with my grandmother, or one last Bears game with my grandfather. Do not take your family for granted, because you never know what tomorrow will bring.
2. Be kind to yourself. Instead of looking in the mirror and judging or feeling bad for yourself, be grateful for your health and be proud of your body.
3. Work on you FOR you. It is okay to want to become healthier and change your appearance, but make sure that you’re doing it for the right reasons. Don’t do it for the model on Instagram or guy in your Chemistry class, do it for you. Progress is only made when the motivation behind it is right. STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHERS!
4. SLOW DOWN. Enjoy what life brings and remind yourself to focus on the little things. The things that make you smile, make you laugh. When you look back, those moments are the only ones that you remember, so live them. Embrace the moment and enjoy it.
5. Write it down. I found that journaling is one of the most, if not the most therapeutic and relieving things that I can do. I look back at things I wrote months back and find little progress that I’ve made along the way. It reminds me that I’m still learning and growing, but most importantly, that it’ll pass.
6. Politics do not define people.
7. Save your money! I have to say, this is still a work in progress… As I grow up I am beginning to find things that I want to do and experience in my life, and saving money is the key to doing them. Don’t worry though, it only took me 20 years to figure out.
8. Find your faith. Before college I was very timid with my relationship with God and treated it as more of a burden than a gift. I learned what faith meant to me and how to explore it at my own pace, and from that I have grown tremendously.
9. Pray. Not for the things you want, but for the things you are grateful for.
10. Retail therapy is real. Grab your mom, your best friend or whoever it is that relates to you on this level and SHOP. (Keep #7 in mind of course)
11. Be a nice human. Being kind goes a long way. One smile or compliment can turn around someone’s day. Be the reason.
12. Surround yourself with people that bring out the best in you. Let the success of others inspire and motivate you to be better. You are a direct result of the people you surround yourself with, so ask yourself- do you like who you are when you are with them?
13. Focus on the memory, not the content. Do it for you, not the Instagram photo that would come from it.
14. It is okay to feel uncomfortable with heavy topics. Educate yourself, and be open to changing your perspective when presented with a new idea. I recently learned something that I think would be beneficial to share. In a recent Zoom event, the speaker explained that in life we try to create SAFE spaces where everyone feels welcomed and loved, but what we should strive to do is create BRAVE spaces, where everyone feels comfortable being their most candid and unapologetic self, on top of feeling welcomed and loved.
15. Take the risk. My parents have inspired me more than they’ll ever know. They taught me that although things may be scary, you will never know the outcome until you try. All it takes is determination, work ethic and a leap of faith to get you one step closer to the life you wish to lead.
16. It is OKAY to not know what you want to do in the future. Instead of feeling behind or rushed, find you passions and run with them. What is meant to be will be and what isn’t will happen for a reason.
17. It is not about what you have, but about who you are. No amount of money can buy your compassion, your love, or your happiness. The energy and positivity you radiate is what stands out to others.
18. Be CRAZY! Don’t try and grow up too fast, enjoy life as it comes and do the things you probably shouldn’t do. You have an entire life of worry ahead, so live in the moment and try something that scares you.
19. Know your worth. Never let the words or actions of others tear you down.
20. Tell your parents you love them. Whether they know it or not, remind them.

Let the countdown to 21 begin!